Gleanings

One of the convictions i hold is that anyone in whom the Holy Spirit dwells (1 John 4:13) has something to offer other saints. While i may not agree with everything a person may assert, I hope i am hearing what the Spirit is saying through that person. I call this gleaning.
One recent gleaning i received I have never heard before. A brother Matt in Ct. expressed a parallel between the tablets of the testimony (10 Commandments) lodging within the ark of the covenant as opposed to being written on its sides, and the Word of God written on our hearts. "Your word I have hidden in my heart, that I might not sin against you." (Ps. 119:11) Obvious and profound, yet I don't remember anyone ever having said it in almost forty years.

Also had the privilege of attending a wedding of a young brother and friend named Rob. God continues to fascinate me. As an unmarried brother, I sometimes find it odd that He has given me any number of young men to interact with on the subject of marriage. In fact, praying for young men and occasionally young women, to find godly spouses comprises a growing part of the ministry He has granted me. For those whom God has not yet given a mate let me offer a few reflections.

Develop a friendship first. This is the soil from which a healthy marriage can grow. The powerful romantic fantasy that our entire culture fabricates leads to disillusionment and myriad woes. Do group activities before doing anything as a pair.
You will marry a person, but marry into a family. In most cases they have provided both the genetic and the environmental inheritance for your spouse. They have developed an unwritten way of relating that they know better than you. Spend as much time with them as possible to understand how they have influenced your prospective mate.
If possible get to know your prospective spouse's parents. They are the best guide to what your spouse will be like in thirty years or so. Do you like what you see?
If you want a godly mate, then you need to cultivate godliness in your own life.
Speaking of cultivating, a pleasant speaking voice is a plus. You will want your spouse to listen to you for a long time.
Most important of all: Receive God's love for you personally. Most people have difficulty with this. Human love is too weak to cope with the onslaughts of the pagan society in which we live, one hostile to God and His ways.
Opposites attract. I question whether they stay attracted. I advocate finding someone with as many similarities as possible.
Once married, it is imperative that both husband and wife establish godly friendships with other people. Far too many men count their wife as their only real friend. If problems occur, they have no one to provide encouragement.
God's heart is lifelong, monogamous marriage between a man and a woman for those who marry. As a single man, i don't believe everyone needs to get married, and I think i'm in the best company with Jesus and Paul.